Maybe You Don't Quite See The 'Klaatu' Factor Yet

LOL

Nearly just about fell off my chair.

So John Hamm's character in the 2008 flick 'The Day The Earth Stood Still' (re-make, obviously) says to Jen Connelly's character at the start of the movie, as the two are walking dramatically fast somewhere, in a state of obvious urgency about something: 'Helen! ...Thought it was important to have you part of this team.'

...It's just afternoon tea with 
the boys and girls.

...My dialogue would have gone like this from there:

Helen: 'Oh -? Why?'

Granier: 'Because you're hot that's why. And Helen, can you please stop with the Hollywood starvation thing because it's not a good look. Like stop, as in Klaatu Barada Nikto already.'

And that freight train would have zoomed out of the station from there and you never would have been able to call it back after that!

Connelly's agent would have been on the phone yelling at you, Hamm would have been suppressing a dodgy kind of half-smile.

Would have been more or less the end of the actual 'story' story too -, about 'Helen' the astrobiologist at Princeton (naturally, would have to be at there...), and this object heading in fast from out-of-space (there's a sign there, reads: 'Out-Of-Space') to impact with Manhattan (where else).

In my version, Granier would have immediately taken off with Helen, in his latest flying car thing-y he got from Mohammed bin Maktoum in Dubai, heading off like the end scenes of Blade Runner, to some out of the way wilderness place, while all the self-replicating nano-bots that came off the space ship which landed in Central Park (naturally, where else) that afternoon, eat everything man-made that is in their way - to wherever it was they were headed.

On the way out - as they fly away - Helen turns to Granier: 'Why are you running away? Aren't you going to save humanity?'

And Granier says to Helen: 'Shut up Helen.'

'Helen' - in The Day The Earth Stood Still.
Aiiiyee! Run for your lives.
It's the end of the world!

And Helen says: 'Don't you tell me to shut up. I am a female and an astrobiologist at Princeton, and you are just nothing but a toxic white maleness thing.'

Granier: 'So what was your plan then, you know, in life? Make some huge dollars from CIA for helping them come up with a lunatic 'Alien invasion' scenario that they can spin for the dumb public, and then buy a mansion in Martha's Vineyard?' Granier chuckles to himself there. 'Well I don't like your plan. We've thrown out that plan, and now we're using my plan.'

Helen: 'Who's we?'

Granier: 'Oh you haven't figured that out yet, Professor? Professor at Princeton.' Sneers.

Granier kicks up the flying car whatever it is - the made in China one - and causes Helen's head to be shoved back hard into the soft puffy head-protector section.

'You women, you're only good for one thing. Okay maybe a couple of things.'

'Let me out!'

'Nah shut up.'

***

At last they reach the wherever Granier was headed, a really cool place, lots of cedar trees or Balsam Firs or something...

He releases the seat harness that was holding Helen in. He gestures around them expansively.

Green chutney
afternoon tea sandwiches.
With crusts cut off.

'What d'you wanna do? Run away from here? Off you go then.'

Ten minutes later Granier and Helen are in the kitchen, and Granier is showing Helen how to make 'green chutney' the way ET Aliens like it. So that she can make green chutney sandwiches - with the crusts removed.

'See? You chop the sweet gherkins up like this, and then you mix that all up with mint sauce, and then you throw in some cumin and some dill. They don't like it like the way the Tamils have it with all that curry powder and garlic and whatever. Just like this. This way even that faker Charles Windsor would like it.'

'Well give me the knife then...'

'No way! You wait till I'm out of your reach!' He moves away toward a door.

'Where are you going?' Helen asks with some trepidation, since she has been told there are about to be ET Aliens turning up for scones and jam and sandwiches and tea.

'Eeeeeh-eeeeh - don't you worry about where I'm going. And if you think I won't be able to see if you try anything smart -, dumb that is, well - see that round orb thing sitting on the corner cabinet there? Well that is sending me video of everything in here and if you try to run too far it will chase you down and zap you.'

'Zap?' 

'Yeah like, you know, just imagine I am Bill Gates and I am saying it's gonna zap you, in the arm there; zap zap.'

'Are you going to be very long?'

This is not Prosecco, obviously.
Prosecco will make you
'bubble drunk.'

'I am just going to make sure we have enough wine down in the cellar.' Granier says as he starts to walk out the door, but then turns his head briefly: 'I can hear you thinking about coming out and locking the door to the cellar, locking me in there. Just forget it. Stoopid idea. What are you going to do all by yourself when the ET's turn up? ...By the way what kind of wine do you like?'

'Prosecco.'

'Prosecco? You like Prosecco. Figures. Yeah you'll be sorry. Me and the Aliens know tricks about straws and bubbles you know.'

***

Night had fallen.

Helen has decided she is not going to murder Granier just right away at least. Maybe after dinner.

Granier has had an oven roast on for a few hours already.

Helen has completely downed a whole bottle of Prosecco.

Grainer takes the roast out from the oven, and presently carves many inside-pink pieces and lays them out on the very large white platter.

There's greens. There's baked pumpkin.

...There's little bright twinkly stars in the clear night-sky outside too.

'Where are your famous ET Aliens?' Helen asks -, a touch sarcastically, Granier thinks.

There's a gentle knock at the open front door.

'We're in here.' Granier answers the knocking. 'Come right in.'

It was a young girl, well, a woman, maybe mid twenties - shaggy and feathered hair with thick blunt bangs and shoulder length locks angled toward the face. A rather hippie kind of style of clothing.

Definite scent of Sixties patch frag and Seventies tutti frutti chewing gum.

She was, in fact, actually chewing gum.

'Helen, meet Bree.'

'Is she an Alien?' Helen asks.

The recent arrival laughed. 'Am I a what? An Alien?'

You're always gonna 
need this stuff!

You know the funny thing about 'The Day The Earth Stood Still' is that for some reason, they have Keanu Reeves' character at the start being a solitary mountaineer exploring the Karakoram mountains in India. And then he 'encounters a glowing sphere' which knocks him unconscious and then when he awakens he finds there is a scar on his hand, where a sample of his DNA has been taken.

LOL 

I really find that quite funny.

The most dangerous person on this planet, right now, is the one you might have to say 'Klaatu Barada Nikto' to, and Chris Wray, my friend, unless you're hot like the kids in the film-script says above, well it ain't gonna work for you, buddy. Even if you had the wit to use it when things start getting a bit desperate. The 'most dangerous' thing is not any nano-bots and stuff.

...Oh you guys wanna see the ET Aliens -, when they arrive at the wilderness place?

Well they also have those kinds of short-cropped hair styles, except they have long pointy ears and very straight-across long almond eyes and eyebrows that give the appearance though not the reality, of up-slanted angular orbital sockets. The rest of their face is very angular though and that is where the impression comes from. And yes they have these long long scrawny fingers and hands.

It's not so much that 'Helen' is liable to get scared when she sees the ET Aliens. It's when she sees herself in a reflective surface somewhere and realizes that over the last few hours... ...her own ears have been changing. And her eyes.

A lot of people say they have no 'scars' where someone has taken some sample DNA. But then, if you place them in a monitored process of regression under hypnosis - they mostly all have had samples taken. ...I mean real people, not imaginary NPC binaries walking around you as if they are actual conscious individual unit living human beings. We don't lose actual people you know! Nothing is ever lost.