Don't Mess With Food (Much)

So the rule is, never mess with food. Don't mess around with the ingredients, and don't imagine though, that what is written and proclaimed everywhere as the ingredients, and/or 'how you do it' - really is all that true.

It is not important for now how people gather the genuine authentic ways to do things. Don't worry about that.

Just sit back, and partake...

The reality is, you need really good dinner companions, and I have often found though that consists of just one person - you.

'Shanghai style' - beef soup.
Influenced by the Russians
of course.

Look I could, go over a list of most interesting table companions that I have had down through the years. But let's not do that.

Let's just take a look at what we're doing tonight.

Plain ordinary beef soup, or stew, whatever.

Okay fair enough, it's expensive fillet steak that we're using. Fillet is pretty tasteless I find, in comparison to other cuts, and it is regularly way more expensive too, but in this case, it'll be what we want, because we are looking for it to be very tender - which fillet gets to be pretty easily and quickly.

...But nothing much else out of the ordinary: just burn the outsides of the steak - after adding some pepper and salt - then chop it up, chuck it into a larger cooking utensil and throw your stock in.

Boil some small potato slices, parsnip slices, and carrot slices in another container. And when they're done, get rid of the water and add those bits in with the steak bits and stock.

Maybe you can even add so 'au jus' in with the stock. But you don't have to if you haven't got that. A little bit of sweet vermouth. Cracked garlic pods, skins on. A handful of sliced plain mushrooms. Paprika.

Three tablespoons of tomato concentrate. I like to use some fennel seeds and a couple of bay leaves towards the end there. ...A few spoons of black winter truffle salsa.

Now.

Now you make sure the person you are giving this to is watching you, see.

And you let them see you pour in a goodly amount of cognac.

If you want to go Hungarian, you can spoon in sour cream when you are serving the thing -, even some dried Kashmiri (or Hungarian) chilis. Or not, but I would. (I've left out any onions because my Russian interpreters for some reason don't like onions - which, usually, you would always have in there!!)

The French tend to put pearled onions in as well. Up to you.

But then, just as you are about to serve the thing, you have this eye-dropper, see, with Amanita Muscaria decarboxylated extract. And you make sure they see you placing a good three or four drops into their dish, or bowl.

And they go 'what is that?' 

And you just open the Yalumba The Octavius - and let that sit on the sideboard for them for a while as they decide whether they are going to eat the soup or just stare at it.

'So what was that best dinner and wine you ever had, you were telling me? At the Dolder Grand in Zurich, was it?

'And then, when was it - after that or before that or both - you were sleeping in the black volcanic rocks bed they have their in their spa?'

...After a few spoonfuls of the soup, whoever it is, is starting to feel like there is a soft pink cloud surrounding their body. And then, after you pour the wine out for them just a few moments later, they start to literally see colored metallic wrapping ribbon magically appearing and dancing in front of their eyes, then with one of those cheap Hong Tong toy Santa Claus battery-powered glow-light figurines - giant-sized but - standing right up close behind them going 'Ho Ho Ho...!'

You could be the richest rich kid of Dubai, and you have never experienced anything like that before in your life, unless you have been to Calvin's place.

True or not true, Bill Smith?

(I know you can't get too much internet coverage from where you are right now, so you don't have to answer here).

How 'bout thou, JES? : )

(...And when y'all gonna learn not to doubt the Calvin? LOL I know some of you are having fewer and fewer doubts. But let's leave that whole story about faith to one side; we are in the day and age of understanding. So let's try and see if we can get to there - understanding).