TAX DODGING, MONEY LAUNDERING?

Who is more exciting to talk to – a top-notch porn star, or a top-flight professional investor and tycoon?

I've met Richard Branson; and he's a rarity. He has presence, charisma, sparkle, and hard-core gravitas too at the same time. Recently I saw him in a television interview and hey!, even he looked a little tired and worn down by the wall-to-wall thickness that seems to be the zeitgeist of the era.

Trump is a bore most of the time. Though don't be fooled, he has one or two decent chops when it comes to selling. But you don't get to see them unless you're where he is when he's decided he wants to make the sale to someone...

On the whole though, today, we are presented by the media with a very incorrect picture of a top money person. The great big secret about big money is they don't want to advertise it at all. So Trump's not really a good example. There's a guy walking your streets, he's not making a splash, he's not trying to impress anyone – and he doesn't need the tax man to see where he's really at. So maybe you don't even want to know him, or learn what he knows, or listen to him... Go away then, this is not for you!

In practice, tax dodging only becomes relevant when you know how to make money in the first place; you really can't make money from cheating on taxes you don't yet even owe! And it's not like 'being prepared' either because that ability to make money is a vast bridge to cross first. But, nevertheless, there is an industry of tax dodging in existence, an industry that fundamentally doesn't work (meaning, can't deliver).

Those who can deliver are amazing people. And very rare. They are not 'an industry.' They are entirely bespoke. The real-life, super-skilled, top-flight money guy or gal is more stunningly thrilling than you can imagine. And they are super-secretive. You can't buy that centrefold at a public newsstand.

But people chase publicity-machine illusions with such vigor! The whole of Dubai is nothing but a conglomeration of contemporary machine-synthetic sportspeople and financial wannabes, most of Singapore a wrapped-in-plastic, self-involved, property bubble of cultureless freaks, and part of every Michelin three-star experience is the middle classes wanting to believe.

Today, Wayne Rooney is paying, apparently, 'tax mitigation experts' to help him keep more from the tax man; and so are a number of his contemporaries in that league of big dollar earners. He'll be wasting his time and his money. As will the others.

Over the last forty years, the big time money laundering and tax cheating has involved people, channels, and locations ripely flowing with wa-a-y excess cash – not cash that needs to be saved, not that Rooney et al need to save! Arab oil money, South American drug money, illegal arms dealing. The style of financial dealing then was governed by the free-flowing spiggots. The free-for-all mentality of the ruling families of the Gulf and oligarchic Pakistan in particular created the background that spawned Agha Hasan Abedi, BCCI and its after-effect: Osama bin Ladin. Visible money laundering and tax law-breaking is all about overwhelming arrogance, egos, and self-important mindless greed.

Today, rueing those early associations, much of the oil elite steers well clear of the London-centric fast life, which is the true philosophical source of the main problem. And today, overpaid, over-hyped, over-pampered 'sportspeople' foisted onto the entire world by Rupert Murdoch's television and iPad monopolies are the feedstock for supposedly clever and also usually London-based accountants.

I am assuming you are not in any one of those above-mentioned groups and tribes, whether leader or minion only.

The principle of effective handling of wealth – which is the correct terminology, and encompasses everything – is rooted in the understanding of the effects of time on strategic structures. And on the incomprehensibility by the authorities of the veritably ambiguous.

The success of tax dodging utterly relies on veritable ambiguity; not just ambiguity alone, but veritable, ambiguity. Veritable, because one absolutely cannot disprove it, but one could prove it, if it were necessary to do so. And of course it also relies on silence and secrecy. L'interdit.

Proper tax dodging and money laundering suits the small to mid-sized trading situation, not the Leviathan, who is really talking about political influence rather than dodging revenuers. But a few tiny bottles of ORB would still get you a couple of Aston Martins no differently than the wallet of Wayne Rooney could, and with far less unwanted attention.

But what is ORB and why will ORB ever be thusly expensive? Because it is forever linked to a world famous brand and type of French wine of which we must now restrain ourselves from speaking the name thereof in case of law suits pending! ...Once again l'interdit. But no substitution will be brooked, and only natural, organic and no synthetic processes allowed there. Therefore also the passage of expensive time. That is why these things are prized and valued in the first place.

Oh yes friends. For ORB is a real thing. It really exists and is known about and traded, used and invested in, in those circles where making money is truly understood.

It is not illegal and attracts no duties and little attention through airports and terminals. And it is the smallest, densest, store of pure dollar – and liquid dollar - value in the world. The implications are obvious. You can shift large sums anywhere. You can store or hide large sums easily. It is fungible, you can intermingle it. There are huge deductible expenses that you can claim for owning and dealing in it. The Rothschilds certainly know about it, but the chances of any London accountant knowing or ever having heard of it are, in my estimation, close to absolutely 'nil.' So much for what Wayne Rooney's money is going to buy him in this area of intellectual know-how. Real knowledge, is real power, but real knowledge and power are really, really, secret.

And so to the porn star... Ah but let's wait till the next posting for all that.

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